Keys To Forgiveness
I remember attending a workshop a few years back wherein the facilitator continuously stressed the importance of forgiving others for their ill deeds, but focusing especially on the need to forgive ourselves.
Now, I’ve always believed myself to be a spiritual person and someone who moves with kindness, so when she was speaking I brushed her message off, thinking I had already forgiven those who needed forgiving.
As time passed, I sensed judgments pop up in my mind and watched as my thoughts were pulled back toward past memories of the negative things people have done to me and to those I love. On top of this, I was carrying around some guilt and shame for past trespasses I’ve committed toward others.
The truth was, while I thought I had forgiven certain people, there was still unforgiveness festering within.
One of the major areas of this unforgiveness was centered around an old friend of mine who seemed to get over on me. In our business relationship, he ended up taking a few thousand dollars from me and never repaid it.
This still has a soft spot in my heart, which is an indicator that more forgiveness work is needed.
Over the past year as I walked my mind and spirit through this situation time and time again, I realized how things that cause unforgiveness can be like an impassable hurdle that keeps us stuck in anger, rooted in hurt and cemented in pain. But I’ve also seen that as we start to forgive, it helps us soar into a higher and greater version of ourselves.
Truth is, from a young age, there have been many people and events I’ve been able to forgive, but it always seems like there is one more person or event I could add forgiveness too.
It is my hope through sharing these insights that you can forgive the seemingly unforgivable, and find peace in your heart and mind through this process.
Poison or Compassion
When you walk through the process of forgiving another person or forgiving yourself, you see the greatest battle is that which takes place in your own mind.
In my life I’ve realized that when I allow the ill deeds of another person to rest in my mind and I constantly remind myself of how they wronged me or how I let myself down, it is as if I am taking a syringe filled with toxins and injecting it into my consciousness.
At times it has become a self-inflicted poison I take day after day, and sometimes minute after minute. There have been times when I was drinking this poison multiple times throughout the day and even falling asleep with the scepter in my hand.
However, when you or I seek to move into forgiveness, we can set down the poisonous elixir and invite compassion into our hearts and minds.
I don’t know about you, but compassion feels so much better than feelings of guilt, anger, shame and pain.
While it is quite true that difficult situations present themselves in our lives and we are forced to deal with a variety of people and events on a daily basis, we do not have to create a poisonous concoction of unforgiveness and ingest it as a result.
Remember, at any given moment you can shift your thoughts away from hurt, pain and anger by adding compassion to the equation. Over time, compassion can help heal the deep wounds that many carry with them throughout their life.
It all begins with you.
3 Keys To Forgiveness
#1 – Inner Forgiveness – Forgiveness should first be found within, you should find peace in your heart. Look back at those moments of inner disappointment and reconnect with the present moment of now. Realize from a deep level that everything has been essential in the development of who you are today, both the highs and the lows.
As you open your mind to this, shift your thoughts toward the positive, know that regardless of what occurred and the shame or guilt that dwells within you, in this moment of now you can realign those feelings toward the positive. Choose to no longer sip the poison of unforgiveness that contaminates your inner temple, and connect with the ever-present flow of compassion that can be found within.
#2 – Outer Forgiveness – All forgiveness in the outer world must first be found within you. You cannot fully forgive another if you are holding them hostage in your mind. As difficult as it may be, as wrong as their deed may seem, make a conscious choice to look deeply at the situation and inject peace into it. Then do the same for every situation that has tainted your outer experience.
You need not speak with the person, you can simply send them thoughts of forgiveness, peace and compassion in this moment from wherever you are.
#3 – Continuous Realignment – Often, forgiveness isn’t just a one and done thing. I encourage you to keep your spirit in the highest state and allow forgiveness to continuously flow from you. You can realign your mind and thoughts in a way that you empower feelings of peace and compassion in your consciousness. True forgiveness is something you can fuel on a moment to moment basis. As easy as it is to hold a grudge you must remember it is just as easy to hold peace for yourself and for others.
Carry forgiveness with you each day and catch your thoughts when they start focusing on the negatives done by others or the negatives you’ve done unto yourself.
Forgiveness Challenge
I challenge you to reach into your mind and find one thing or person you need to forgive.
Be willing to embrace these 3 Keys and carry them with you through this forgiveness challenge.
If you are wondering who you should forgive, think about someone you may despise, someone who caused grief in your life, or something you did that has prompted hurt or shame to blossom in your experience.
Forgiveness is an inside job and forgiveness is something you must create for yourself.
Release the poison and invite in compassion.
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Peace
Happiness
Compassion
Respect
Jeffon Seely